I have the weirdest cousin(s). After a long period of incontact, we kind of talked online these days. Today, he came online, wished me good luck for tmr's paper, told me not to stay up too late studying for it; and then he disappeared - went offline. I'm like, right, you dint even give me a chance to reply you!
I sent him an offline msg. And I think that my cousin is astonishingy funny in the weird way and also lovely to remember that I actually have a paper tmr. I dont even rmb telling him!
Thursday, April 30, 2009
whatever will be will be
Today's the birthday of a friend, happy 21. Being 21 but not yet reaching 21, I'm still enjoying the benefits that of a child. For example, the Thai trip that is going to take place in 3 weeks (excited!) require us to buy travel insurance, which is more than 50% cheaper if you are a child, below 21 years of age, as of 1st May 09. As an young adult, I feel myself having to grapple with the notions and the constant questions of what am I going to do after graduation, doing honours or no honours and that sort of questions. To which, I often have no answers. Even doing honours itself is a huge question mark, as my borderline grades do allow myself to qualify for the application if I'm consistent and willing, but does not provide a safety net for a lesser grade. Honours, is something that I dont see myself doing, but seems required and a good way to get away from the horrible economic situation.
You see, I'm confused as to what is expected of me. To start with, I have a weird mother who did not want me to go to university and prefer me to settle for less in a polytechnic. I told you she's weird. But she had been very supportive and allowed me to pursue what I wanted academically even though she had to work very hard for me and for it. In uni, I'm pursuing my passion in a major that people often see no future in, and I'm too unsure as to where my passion can take me. Especially so if I want to graduate with a bachelor's degree. I have visions of what I see myself doing, which I know is not very possible. But I'm daring myself to dream and to attain the impossible.
But back-up plans are a must. Relatives and whoever always tell me that I could be a teacher. No not me. There are too many reasons why I did not want to pursue this childhood ambition of mine, voicebox failing being one of them, but yeps. And as much as I say that 'back-up plans are a must', I refuse to deal with it, and thus no research whatsoever on the jobs that I can go into.
I must say that I'm pretty much a happy-go-lucky person. I take things as they come. I focus on the short term stuff rather than the long term ones. I never went to look for things that are needed to 'zhng' my resume, but only do what is required of me. In a sense, I sometimes feel that I can't be bothered with the practicalities of life.
reading what I've written above, I realised that I do not have a solution to the above problem and I do not want to look for a solution. Looking for the solution is too adult, and I do not want to be associated as such. You know, trying to grapple the notions of adulthood and its responsibilities, is scary.
On a sidenote, one exam down and three more to go. This sem is a killer.
You see, I'm confused as to what is expected of me. To start with, I have a weird mother who did not want me to go to university and prefer me to settle for less in a polytechnic. I told you she's weird. But she had been very supportive and allowed me to pursue what I wanted academically even though she had to work very hard for me and for it. In uni, I'm pursuing my passion in a major that people often see no future in, and I'm too unsure as to where my passion can take me. Especially so if I want to graduate with a bachelor's degree. I have visions of what I see myself doing, which I know is not very possible. But I'm daring myself to dream and to attain the impossible.
But back-up plans are a must. Relatives and whoever always tell me that I could be a teacher. No not me. There are too many reasons why I did not want to pursue this childhood ambition of mine, voicebox failing being one of them, but yeps. And as much as I say that 'back-up plans are a must', I refuse to deal with it, and thus no research whatsoever on the jobs that I can go into.
I must say that I'm pretty much a happy-go-lucky person. I take things as they come. I focus on the short term stuff rather than the long term ones. I never went to look for things that are needed to 'zhng' my resume, but only do what is required of me. In a sense, I sometimes feel that I can't be bothered with the practicalities of life.
reading what I've written above, I realised that I do not have a solution to the above problem and I do not want to look for a solution. Looking for the solution is too adult, and I do not want to be associated as such. You know, trying to grapple the notions of adulthood and its responsibilities, is scary.
On a sidenote, one exam down and three more to go. This sem is a killer.
Friday, April 24, 2009
fly fly fly
I'm a little upset with myself cus i have not been very productive in terms of studying.
But that email cheered me up. Yay I'm flying SQ when I'm coming back from Thailand! And I thought it was going to be budget airline. So I'm happy!
Damn it. I'm so easily contented/ happy/ whatever.
But that email cheered me up. Yay I'm flying SQ when I'm coming back from Thailand! And I thought it was going to be budget airline. So I'm happy!
Damn it. I'm so easily contented/ happy/ whatever.
Saturday, April 18, 2009
LAS
My neighbourhood is a very happening place.
You have sepak takraw gang at this particular badminton court every evening. The badminton court hence gained fame and everyone decided to come and play sepak takraw there. Once, there were so many of them from this xyz company that there was at least 7 vans parked along the stretch of road that was next to the court. I was like, wow!
Then you have the bartender, practising his tricks with plastic or foam bottles at the playground downstairs. Throwing, spinning, twisting then catching. He can do whatever. Of cus, he's bound to draw audiences. I once saw this uncle who was supp to be walking his dog, stopping to watch the bartender do his tricks. And the uncle was very blatant about it. He stood like merely two metres away from the bartender and watched him intently.
Then you know, the roller-blading gang. They have lesser meet-ups now, probably cus school have started and stuff. I bet they'll be back when the holidays kicked in.
Not forgetting Romeo, who calls out to Cheryl every evening without fail. He does it so often that Cheryl gets irritated and yet pleased by the attention that he was showering upon her. Sometimes, Cheryl doesnt reply to his calls, and I cant help but be cheeky by shouting "cheryl not home" or smth to him. Btw, Romeo's not his real name. It's a nickname that my brother and I gave him. hee.
Today, a celebration is being held at the 'atrium'. Now now, Malay weddings and Chinese festivals are common. But have you ever seen an Indian festival being held at a void deck before? I'm in awe I tell you. This is my first time witnessing such an event. Pity I dont understand what's going on but they are playing some really festive music which is quite good. There's like pockets of pple gathering ard the atrium trying to figure out what they are doing and stuff. But I got a feeling that half of them sre clueless as to what is happening as well. But this, is racial harmony at its best.
See, there's always something interesting happening. The pigeons and the cats irritate me a lot though, but even they could be interesting - think sleuthing cat trying to pounce on unsuspecting pigeons. Why pigeons I dont knw, cus they are huge. Sparrows could have been better, but guess they are too jittery and too agile.
You have sepak takraw gang at this particular badminton court every evening. The badminton court hence gained fame and everyone decided to come and play sepak takraw there. Once, there were so many of them from this xyz company that there was at least 7 vans parked along the stretch of road that was next to the court. I was like, wow!
Then you have the bartender, practising his tricks with plastic or foam bottles at the playground downstairs. Throwing, spinning, twisting then catching. He can do whatever. Of cus, he's bound to draw audiences. I once saw this uncle who was supp to be walking his dog, stopping to watch the bartender do his tricks. And the uncle was very blatant about it. He stood like merely two metres away from the bartender and watched him intently.
Then you know, the roller-blading gang. They have lesser meet-ups now, probably cus school have started and stuff. I bet they'll be back when the holidays kicked in.
Not forgetting Romeo, who calls out to Cheryl every evening without fail. He does it so often that Cheryl gets irritated and yet pleased by the attention that he was showering upon her. Sometimes, Cheryl doesnt reply to his calls, and I cant help but be cheeky by shouting "cheryl not home" or smth to him. Btw, Romeo's not his real name. It's a nickname that my brother and I gave him. hee.
Today, a celebration is being held at the 'atrium'. Now now, Malay weddings and Chinese festivals are common. But have you ever seen an Indian festival being held at a void deck before? I'm in awe I tell you. This is my first time witnessing such an event. Pity I dont understand what's going on but they are playing some really festive music which is quite good. There's like pockets of pple gathering ard the atrium trying to figure out what they are doing and stuff. But I got a feeling that half of them sre clueless as to what is happening as well. But this, is racial harmony at its best.
See, there's always something interesting happening. The pigeons and the cats irritate me a lot though, but even they could be interesting - think sleuthing cat trying to pounce on unsuspecting pigeons. Why pigeons I dont knw, cus they are huge. Sparrows could have been better, but guess they are too jittery and too agile.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Saturday, April 4, 2009
project. project. project
A friend ask me recently how was school and how were the projects coming along. I didnt know how to start. I dint know how to tell her how horrible it has been. Project members that have NO aesthetic skills and no appreciation for perfection are bugging me as the stuff that they are churning out are seriously ugly and slipshod. I have a layer of the project with me and I am planning on giving it a complete makeover. The other layer is with someone else whom I think has no intention to do the same. Its the ugliest piece of work that I'm ever involved in. I feel so tired and embarrassed of having to keep telling them its ugly so I just gave up eventually cus its still ugly even after they edited it. And then there's that MCP who seriously makes my blood boils with his ridiculous ideas that I was trying so hard to contain my thoughts and emotions on his stupidity and let the others knock some sense into him. I mean, after 6 hours of project work and you still have to deal with such stupid people, I would have shoot him really badly with my words. And its not nice, judging from the fact that I still have to deal with him in future. I'm so going to do badly for this project.
And there's 2 other projects due 1 week later that I've barely started. I feel so tired and so drained that I dont even know how I should approach them anymore. This has been my busiest semester so far. To think that I thought last sem was bad. Compared to this sem, last sem was a breeze. In addition, lecturers are not as nice and approachable as last sem.
And then you know that something is wrong when the glutton dont even feel like eating anymore. sigh.
And there's 2 other projects due 1 week later that I've barely started. I feel so tired and so drained that I dont even know how I should approach them anymore. This has been my busiest semester so far. To think that I thought last sem was bad. Compared to this sem, last sem was a breeze. In addition, lecturers are not as nice and approachable as last sem.
And then you know that something is wrong when the glutton dont even feel like eating anymore. sigh.
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